Monday 27 April 2015

I Just Wanna Sleep...

Have you ever woken up on a Monday morning, groaned and wished harder than you did for a bike at Christmas to be blessed with another five minutes in bed before facing the oh-so-cruel world? Although the wishing-for-a-bike part isn't necessarily true for me (as, at the grand old age of 16, I still don't know how to ride a bike - though I'm certainly an expert in running in heels around the likes of Asda), I experienced the most gut-wrenching feeling upon being awoken by a colourful stream of light this morning. The source of pain within my stomach wasn't entirely down to having one or two more roast potatoes than my digestive system could handle: in fact, the horrible realisation of Monday being here produced more agony than stuffing a packet of chocolate digestive down your throat ever could.

Still, isn't it fair to say that everybody feels the same by the time Monday morning rolls around? Like the grumpy cat Garfield, we growl at the thought of being dragged out of bed when we haven't gotten over from having late nights at the weekend, which we feel is a violation of our right to rest. Indeed, I regard it as horrifying that I, a teenager, should have to get up at the crack of dawn on a Monday - my nature begs me to stay in bed for as long as possible, a.k.a. literally my whole life! If it wasn't for fighting a losing battle against nature, I would certainly take this matter to court, but I have a feeling that it wouldn't really work in my favour...

Rant over. Feeling happier now? Certainly. Once those stored up feelings are released into the already-polluted air and contribute to the ever-growing problem of global warming, I shall feel less stressed about facing Mondays. And, to be honest, Monday isn't a particularly bad day because, once I manage to finish my breakfast and complete my hair-styling/make-up-applying duties, I tend to forget that I was having a luxurious lie-in twenty four hours before.

It's just that Mondays seem to provide a perfect excuse to complain to my heart's content as most people tend to relate to that 'ugh-I-can't-believe-that-I've-got-to-get-up-before-midday' feeling which slices through us like a pointed knife.

Fortunately, I've had quite a pleasant start to the week (though not entirely due to having a different packed lunch today, though wholemeal pittas are always irresistible!). By 'pleasant', I secretly mean that I got a FANTASTIC grade in one of my mock exams and, now that I'm away from the classroom, I can brag about it as much as I want. Hahahahaha!!!

Seriously, there are times at school when all I want to do is scream like a cat whose tail has been trodden on (though I would never be stupid enough to do that to one of my four precious darlings). The reason why? I'm desperate to express my glee and excitement over achieving grades that I definitely underestimated myself from achieving; believe me, there is nothing greater than receiving results that far outshine your wildest expectations.

For example, I honestly and completely believed that, after barely answering several questions in my Sociology exam last week, I would have struggled to have gotten anything higher than a C, yet I nearly cheered like a boisterous football fan when I got my paper back today: an A. Yes, yes, yes, I got an A!!! OMG, I had a sudden impulse to either laugh or cry, though I doubt that nothing would have really expressed my shock. Having worried about it over the weekend, I had wondered on whether to explain to my teacher why I didn't perform so well (because my hand hurt so much in the exam that I struggled to write anything), but I still can't get my head around it. Really. And, if that is the worst I can do, who knows what I'll get when I'm performing at my very best?

Several hours before, I received my marks from the English Literature mock that I had sat last Monday. Due to switching sets several months ago, I missed on completing my study of the two books which I had to answer questions to in the exam, An Inspector Calls and Animal Farm. Therefore, I wasn't feeling overly confident about being examined on two books which I didn't feel like I knew inside out - but something must have clicked as I managed to get 32 out of 34 marks in a question I answered on An Inspector Calls and 21 out of 24 on Animal Farm. Nothing woke me up better than receiving those results this morning!!!

All in all, I've had a really good day, despite enduring a horrible hour of ICT in which I'm sitting a test on spreadsheets and the so-called importance of Microsoft Excel. Really, I blame Bill Gates for making my life a misery as I have to sit through two hours of ICT a week and become acquainted with Excel, which is the very worst creation I've ever known. Both fortunately and unfortunately, I've got Parents' Evening next week, so I'd like to hear what my ICT teacher would say about me. 'Well-behaved, but a bit useless when it comes to using computers.' Believe it or not, my family regard me as the computer expert - and I can barely manage at school! Very hopeful, don't you think?

Here's to an easy-going evening - and unlimited sleep, of course...

Saturday 25 April 2015

I'm BACK!!!

Well... it's been a while since my last appearance on this wonderful world that I love to call my blogging home, hasn't it? Though two weeks often seem to take forever to pass, I've barely taken notice of it because of being so absorbed into literally every second of each day - exhausted doesn't truly begin to describe how I'm feeling!

Still. I survived what, this time a fortnight ago, I deeply believed would be impossible to get through. Plastered on my wardrobe door was a sheet of paper which contained my inescapable doom: mock exams. Like the wannabe translator that I sometimes fantasise about being, I interpreted 'mock' as a scornful game against me, seemingly to dupe me into a claustrophobic panic when I hardly had anything to get stressed about. Beneath the inch-thick layer of Bare Minerals powder and shimmery eye shadow glittering on my face, I was afraid - as, once again, I was about to embark on a journey that I had never experienced before. 

Without sending ice-cold shivers down your spine or creating a plot for an upcoming horror movie, I'll keep my descriptions of my exams to a bare minimum (with a little help from my beloved cat Bart, whose fascination with my laptop has almost caused me to drop on a number of occasions) because I really don't want to scare you - whether you're on the verge of sitting exams or have already done so! 

Really, all I can say is that going through these exams has been a massive learning curve for me because I've finally approached a once-vibrant fear in its face which, from the angle I saw it, isn't as ugly as it is often portrayed to be. OK, there have been one or two moments of sheer panic along the way, most notably my Sociology mock yesterday when I ran out of time to tackle several important questions, but isn't it what everybody experiences at one point or another? Anyway, I've realised that, by acknowledging any faults that I might have right now, I'll undoubtedly be in a better and more confident position by the time I sit my real (and oh-so-scary) exams next year, which is now twelve months away - about time to start screaming my head off, don't you think? 

Therefore, I've literally spent almost every spare moment that I've had on revising like an actor repeatedly learning their lines for a potentially life-changing audition, procrastinating about revision and, as you would expect from a very sleepy teenager, not revising at all. Still, my life of late - definitely since the Easter holidays commenced over a month ago - has been defined by revision and studying, which has definitely affected my desires to have some precious fun. 

Sure, there is absolutely no doubt that studying can sometimes be boring as a re-run of ancient James Bond films on a Sunday afternoon, especially if I'm forcing myself to google the importance of Pythagoras' Theorem the night before an hour of delicious Mathematics hell, but developing this routine will help me so much next year. At the end of the day, I know that my dreams - which have now changed to becoming a teacher (and bossing kids around, haha!) - will finally come alive when I get my GCSE results next summer, so these goals keep my spirits up when I occasionally feel like nothing is working out the way I want it to.

Besides, my one true dream - a weekend piled with sheer laziness, unlimited fun and satisfying ease - is here, so I'm thrilled to be able to do whatever I want! Even though a miniscule voice at the back of my mind is reminding me that I still have a Science mock to revise for (which was supposed to be held on Wednesday, but was later postponed - to the glee of my year group, who were already sitting a second Maths mock on the same day!), I feel that giving myself a break this weekend will make me feel refreshed enough when I return to studying. When exams are coming and going, I struggle to squeeze in a bit of free time because revision is mostly all that my mind can focus on. Hopefully, as I get nearer towards my final exams in a year's time, I will have developed several techniques that will not only maintain my sanity during some crazy times, but will also ensure that I'll get my hands on several pleasing grades!

Now I have a question to ask myself: what am I going to do this week? Asides from blogging (which I have missed like all the chocolate bars that I had to abstain from during Lent several weeks ago!), I really fancy catching up on my favourite TV programmes and possibly devoting an hour or so to playing video games - a.k.a. The Sims 2, which is pretty much the only video game I have! For a while, I simply want to rid my mind of grades, target grades, revision, notes and my upcoming Parent's Evening which, to my relief, allows me to wear my ordinary clothing. Instead of considering what my teachers will say about me, I'm already thinking about which colour eye shadow, earrings and jeans I'll be wearing... some things, such as my vanity, will never change, will they? 

Before I plug in my gingerbread earphones, which are sadly inedible (despite looking very appetising), and listen to some music, I just want to wish everybody the best of luck with their exams - whether they are mocks or terminal. Obviously, sitting in a hall for several hours in absolute silence is intimidating, but we must remember that there is a beautiful world - complete with sunshine or the so-called 'April showers' (which I've hardly seen this month!) - waiting to be enjoyed outside, and exams don't last forever. Knowing me, I'll be eating my words when my turn comes next year, but focusing on the things you enjoy truly do make a difference to your confidence and possibly overall performance. 

Annoyingly, another Maths mock has been booked towards the end of June/beginning of July, so I haven't entirely escaped mock season quite yet, though I'm hoping that I will be living it up on my trip to France by then - as long as I don't spill the beans in front of my teacher! However, I'm already beginning to feel a bit more confident in my abilities, sometimes surprising myself, which has proven to me that I can do it. 

As for creating a spreadsheet on Microsoft Excel, that's another story which I really don't want to go into it!


Sunday 12 April 2015

Saying Goodbye... For A While

After a fortnight of lie-ins, revision and more access to the fridge than any hungry teenager could hope for, my Easter break has almost come to an end. Weep.

Like all heartfelt humans, tears dance in the corner of my eyes as I realise that my two weeks away from routine are so close to being over; really, it somewhat feels so long ago when I arrived home from school at lunchtime, excited about having so many days to devote to doing what I wanted! Yet, as I keep learning, you become almost unaware of time's presence whilst enjoying yourself which, despite the unpleasantness of being unwell and enduring an agonising injection, I've managed to do of late.

In fact, I feel as though I'm going somewhere new tomorrow because school seems to be such a distant reality at the moment, even though I've been going there since before Christmas. Although my attendance in the classroom hasn't been necessary for a while, at least I can proudly declare that my brain hasn't transformed into a pile of sticky mush over the holidays - most definitely one of the benefits of establishing a revision timetable!

Ah, revision... No matter how many times you vow to unplug your laptop from the internet and get on with some work, viewing somebody's Facebook page suddenly becomes more irresistible than tucking into a slice of gooey chocolate cake. Annoyingly, I've landed myself in this so-difficult-get-out-of position on a number of occasions during the holidays because The Vampire Diaries is obviously more fascinating than learning about sound waves (sorry, Science teacher!).

Still, I can't really beat myself up because, at the end of the day, I have revised in one form or another. And, considering that I've had plenty to keep me occupied, shouldn't it be acceptable?

Anyway, I've got several hurdles to get myself over before party time can truly commence in style - ahem, exams are coming up, remember? Whether it should be seen as a blessing or a gift wrapped in blood red from the devil, I only have two exams this week... then FIVE the following. Oh yes, I'm extremely pleased about contending with tough English Lit questions, Science essays and a Puppet performance to be held in my Performing Arts lessons within the same week: I'll certainly be in need of another two week holiday!

However, my mock exam timetable has a weird tendency to change its mind every now and then, so several dates may be incorrect - or some exams (e.g. Maths) may not even be sat at all if luck bothers to be on my side (and stops robbing me of money stupidly wasted on the Euromillions)...

All in all, I've really loved being able to relax and stop obsessing over the little things which tend to define my life during term-time, such as how to style my hair in the morning (yes, I'll definitely admit to being a little crazy when it comes to The Hair), which mascara I ought to wear (Great Lash or Bare Minerals) and the sort of snacks I should put in my lunch (pistachio nuts or dried apricots). Regardless of where I go or what I do, a break is a break - what more could I ask for?

Even though I tend to ignore it, there are times when being away from a heavy-going environment - especially one so focused on exams, questions and lengthy essays - is the cleanest burst of fresh air that you could want, which creates a relaxed mindset that stays with you once you return. Sure, I love routine, but not to the extent that I could follow it all the time!

This leads me to say that, with so many exams to revise for and think about, I'm going to give myself a break from my blogging duties, which need to be abandoned whilst I focus on getting through the next fortnight. Two weeks might seem so long to me right now, but I know that I'll be fine once I get to the 'other side; - hopefully one which will shower me in succulent success! I just need to ensure that my time is being used well during the weekend and after school for a while, which is why I want to cut down on writing as I'll obviously be doing plenty of it in my exams; just what any writer loves!

So... this is it. Farewell for however long I need to focus on my exams - how I will yearn to return to Blogger when I answer three intensive-as-a-workout questions in my English Language paper tomorrow afternoon! For those who are sitting their mocks or actual exams anytime soon, best of luck - as I hope you wish me the same tomorrow!

Thursday 9 April 2015

The Great List of Things That Have Happened (So Far) This Week

Holidays, holidays, holidays - at times, they seem so endless that you begin to wonder whether they will last forever. Although all of us secretly shriek with terror at the prospect of a long holiday coming to an end, holidays can sometimes drag on a little bit, can't they? And, let's face it, every teen hates getting bored, which is far more likely to occur when holidays go on and on for what feels like years. 

Now firmly halfway through my final week off school, I've mostly lost the eager-eyed motivation that shone in my twinkling eyes almost a fortnight ago, brimming with determination to revise harder than I ever have during my sixteen years on this planet. Instead, I've turned into the most terrific procrastinator that Earth has even known, hiding beneath duvets, beds and Google tabs when I really ought to have been tackling a Maths past paper (which I haven't bothered to revise for yet - oops!). 

No matter how many times I promise to work and revise, I find myself doing the exact opposite - with unlimited time that could be devoted to having fun, I cannot resist giving into my weaker senses, who lack the desire to prepare for my upcoming mock exams. Ugh, my heart sings at the thought of going to school as soon as all my exams are over; by then, I shall be preparing for my trip to France in June, which will be my very first adventure abroad. How I yearn to escape to Normandy and make myself at home in a warmly-scented boulangerie until every single mock exam has finished - and it is finally safe to return! Still, I have a rather strong feeling that such a thing will never happen, even though I've just gotten my passport...

Anyway, let's ask none other than myself a question: how has my week been so far? If I had to sum it up in one word, tiring would most definitely be the adjective forming on my lips. Exhausting, draining and indeed tiring is how I'd describe this week, though it could possibly change by the time it ends - or perhaps not! 

Once again, I can't resist posing yet another question to myself, who is already growing tired (haha!) of being asked so many things that she doesn't honestly care about: what has happened? Putting all of it into a list is certainly going to make me even more tired...

1. I've mostly been recovering from being unwell on none other than Easter Sunday, which was thrown into a spectacular chaos when all plans of bingeing on roast beef and Lindt bunnies were ruined after I began to feel under the weather. OK, a day is a day - and I'll obviously have many more Easter Sundays ahead of me - but being unable to do anything was a great nuisance, in addition to feeling ridiculously weak. Fun, huh? 

2. Two days after the Easter fiasco, I ventured outside to be driven miles to have an interview, which was essential in order to obtain my passport. Not realising that a mini heatwave was dominating the world outdoors, I stupidly went out in a thick coat, jumper and thermals (the very thing that has helped me survive the past winter) while the sun was shining like a lazor beam. No wonder I couldn't stop sweating once I got into the car - it was as though I'd wandered into a roasting oven! To make matters worse, my jumper was a light grey, so any sweat marks could have looked extremely obvious - and would have been very hard to conceal...

3. As if suffering from illness at the weekend wasn't enough, I had to go along to the doctor's for an appointment to get my final booster, which hopefully means that I will never have to be near a needle ever again. If it wasn't for still feeling a bit unsteady on my feet, I probably wouldn't have minded having the injection, but I really didn't feel all-too-confident about it yesterday - injections are hardly anything to get excited about! To my annoyment (which I managed to conceal like an inflamed spot), I only found out that I was having a second booster just moments before I had my injection, which only worsened my mood - and ultimately the aches that I'm still feeling strongly less than twenty four hours on. Even now, I'm struggling to lift my arms because pain automatically shoots through them like a bullet, which makes even the least significant tasks (e.g. pouring myself a glass of juice) amazingly difficult. 

And the best thing of all hasn't even happened yet: one of the four trips that my family make to the other side of the country, which shall occur tomorrow (and firmly banish all possible chances of revising). Really, I needn't say that this hasn't been my week!

Monday 6 April 2015

How to Get Over Sickness

Can you think of anything more horrible than recovering from the worst weekend that your body has ever been through? Seriously, I can't bear the thought of considering something more horrific than being unable to move about, paralysed by aches and pains that literally glue me to my bed all day. 

Unfortunately, my plans of devouring my Lindt chocolate bunny yesterday - an Easter Sunday tradition that I've always celebrated - were put on hold yesterday when I was suddenly seized by a stomach bug, which relished the opportunity of depriving me from the usual treats that define Easter. Within hours, my face had paled to a shade even more ghostly than Casper's complexion, while I struggled to close my eyes and transport myself to a world without buckets, six feet-deep blankets and boiling temperatures bothering me for several hours. Just what anybody could hope for - not!

Fast forward twenty four hours, I've mostly recovered from my sickness, yet I haven't entirely gotten rid of a sense of delicateness which I suppose still makes me entitled to special treatment from my family - something that I'm definitely not going to complain about! And, to be honest, I doubt that I'll be tucking into cold jacket potatoes for breakfast every day... 

So, if you have succumbed to any leapt-out-of-nowhere bugs or are feeling rather sorry for yourself after bingeing on one too many Cadbury's Easter eggs, I've gathered some advice on what to do in the meantime until you recover. Recovery isn't an instant process which proves that, despite my hopes of waking up this morning and feeling as fine as I did several days ago, it takes a while to reach the finishing line. Mostly, taking care of yourself requires oh-so-ridiculously-basic common sense, but I really wouldn't trust my wiser senses whilst stumbling around the house in a sleep-deprived haze, would I? 

1. Haribos, I'm breaking up with you...

Obviously a trick that I truly regret not paying attention to yesterday, eating can in fact cause unnecessary stress to your already messed-up digestive system, resulting in more trips to the ugly yellow bucket than your nightmares could ever conjure. Until you are completely, 100% sure that not a drop of yesterday's breakfast will be making a guest appearance, try your hardest to not be seduced by the packet of digestives hidden in the cupboard! 

Still, I did try to eat some food, mainly toast and jacket potatoes (a.k.a. plain foods which Google translate as 'boring'), with a few gingersnaps thrown into my unusual diet (as ginger is often linked with being good for nausea), because I didn't want to deprive my body of any nutrients. Even though going without my typical diet of fruit, vegetables and perhaps a gooey chocolate chip cookie or two for a day was unlikely to throw my body into despair, I disliked the idea of literally starving myself all day long - well, 

2. No parties allowed - just rest!

It isn't every day when you are encouraged by your parents, who generally think that you are the laziest teenager to have ever existed on this planet, to lie on your bed and pretend that you're sunbathing on a beach in Ibiza as you fight the cruel-minded pathogens attacking your body, but at least we know how to make the most of this opportunity! 

However, unlike the numerous parties that we'd never resist going to on Spain's sunniest island, resting is rather boring business, which entirely goes against a teen's principles of having fun all the time. Quel horreur! Still, I nonetheless relished the chance to escape my constant stomach aches and general weakness for several hours whilst closing my eyes and somewhat falling asleep for a little while - it's certainly better than remaining awake, which only provides you with time to spend pitying yourself! 

3. Bye-bye work!

Originally, I'd planned on making the holidays into a non-stop revision session, jam-packed with past papers, examination questions, mind-maps, analysing texts and reading as many books as possible. Despite my best efforts, I've hardly done any of this - and, until I feel more like myself, I have no intention of returning to eager, borderline insane studying mode quite yet. 

For one thing, how can I expect myself to produce work to my usual standard if all I'm thinking about is whether I still need the puke bucket to constantly remain by my side? Dealing with an unpleasant bug is bad enough, but is even worse when you have to contend with intensive work which requires tons of energy - all of which is being channelled into battling your illness. 

As I was intent on making a start on Maths revision, I'm somewhat relieved to not be tackling vectors, rectangles and other horrors for a while. Well, at least I haven't lost my sense of positivity...

4. Readjust slowly

When I woke up this morning and realised that my stomach no longer groaned as horribly as it did yesterday, my instant reaction was to race down the stairs towards the kitchen and raid all the cupboards - because I had absolutely nothing in my system. Sorry to give you such graphic details, but everything that I'd consumed over the weekend had come up, so it was fair to say that I was running on virtually nothing. 

Like a car, I craved to refuel myself with some food, but I somehow managed to get a hold of my brain before hunger took hold of my sanity. As I couldn't be entirely sure that I'd mostly gotten rid of the bug, there was no way that I could start stuffing myself with plate loads of bread quite yet - after all, has recovery ever been an instant process? 

So, approach food and drink (e.g. milk and juice, which can be quite acidic) carefully for the first day or two after the initial yuckiness. A good start is relying on the likes of plain toast and jacket potatoes (with a tiny amount of pepper if you yearn a bit of flavour) before trying other foods. Fizzy drinks such as Pepsi and Coca Cola can ease any uneasiness in your stomach, whilst providing a burst of flavour that is otherwise not present in toast and potatoes - believe me, Cola will definitely become your new best friend!

Whether it was a premonition or pure incidence, I baked tons of gingersnaps on Saturday, which I've mostly been eating today. Ginger is brilliant for reducing symptoms of nausea, whereas the biscuits inject a bit of sweetness and energy, but do bear in mind that eating too many is not a wise idea!

Saturday 4 April 2015

Treasures and Work

Approaching certain events in your life can be really intimidating when, just several years before, you were safely wrapped up in layers of soft, comforting cotton wall by those who care most about you. Escaping the future sometimes presents itself as an irresistible idea if we give into the up-in-the-air feelings which occasionally overpower our wiser senses; after all, shouldn't all of us at least try to savour the present while it lasts? Still, it takes some time until we finally realise - either by our own free will or through the encouragement from others - that running away does not disguise some of the things which we have to embrace. Unless those events are cancelled like a badly selling concert, we really don't have the right to rely on any excuses to get out of the things which we would much rather avoid - obviously, this is a trick that is only learnt by trying (and failing) it!

For example, I've been getting quite stressed out over the past week because I've felt as though I have hardly done any revision for my upcoming mocks, the first of which will be sat on Monday week - totally not the best way to kick off a new term! Although mocks are basically a fake exam, I'm nonetheless aiming to achieve some decent grades because I don't want to fail. OK, those words literally hit the nail on the head: I'm scared of failure. You might have seen some overly dramatic teen movies in which the main star gets a soul-destroying F in his or her Maths paper, which ultimately results in choked-up tears and groans over how to break the news to their oh-so-definitely disappointed parents. Obviously, I don't pay too much attention to these portrayals because I often think that they are egging it a little too much, but these scenes have been flooding my mind like a burst river bank of late - disaster is something that I really can't face!

However, I need to remember that, in order to move ahead towards the future that I'm dreaming off, getting experience - both positive and negative - right now will only serve to boost my confidence by the time I'm sitting my real exams next year. As many of you would agree with me, the first time in practically anything is usually reeking with awkwardness and uncertainty because, unlike a best friend whom you've known inside out since primary school, it is completely alien to you, which immediately makes you feel a bit vulnerable and unsteady on your feet. 

Just several months ago, I experienced this feeling whilst getting used to my home because it is so different to the one that I'd previously grew up in for seven years, yet I've literally forgotten about my old house because my current one has steadily become the place where I can always be myself. So, in a way, I've already gained experience in being able to cope with new things, which has proven to myself that I can adapt rather quickly, but it simply takes a while until I fully get my head around it - well, let's hope that twelve months or so shall be long enough!

My real message today is that, even when we sing at the top of our lungs with joy by the thought of giving up, we should dig deep into ourselves and find the courage to carry on. Of course, there are days when we yearn to remain cuddled up in bed and watch as much trash daytime TV as anyone could ask for, but we owe to none other than ourselves to carry on working towards a future that ought to shine like a well-polished jewel. Whether our hidden treasures are located within our brains, bodies or self-esteem, we should never lose our thirst to find and use it to our advantage - after all, some treasures are priceless. And what is more precious than ourselves at heart? 

Wednesday 1 April 2015

Holding On For Another Day...

Beneath my bed, I've hidden two bars of chocolate nested between my old teddy bears and blankets. Wrapped in pretty sky blues and juicy purple pinks, the chocolate serves as a reminder of what I've forced myself to abstain from for over six weeks, yet also symbolises the gift that I'll be entitled when the abstaining period is finally over. 

Well, let's say that desperation seized hold of me around a week ago, gripping me tighter than a cat's claw, which motivated me to research numerous ways of skirting around my least favourite event of the year: Lent. Ugh, how the word sends horrific shivers down my spine as only suffering and deep longing is endured if I ever sign up to its yearly challenge! Like a Maths test, Lent tests me in many ways that I could never imagine, pushing me further than a ten minute stint on a speeding treadmill ever does. 

At the beginning, I'm full of enthusiasm when I embark on the long six week journey that counts down to Easter, which I'm certain almost every teenager on the planet embraces as the oh-so-perfect excuse to gorge on chocolate and bunny-shaped sweets as though the world could end tomorrow. After a few days of steering clear of my chosen forbidden treat, I start to settle into the mindset that Lent isn't as tough as it is often portrayed to be - in fact, if I've got the willpower to avoid a mouthful of chocolate for one week, who's to say that I can't manage six or more weeks? 

Unfortunately, the early optimism gradually leaves an empty hole within me as time wears on, which builds my chocolate cravings into a state that it hurts to think about it. Suddenly, a week seems as long as a year, particularly so at weekends when I'm surrounded with cupboards piled high with bars of chocolate that I failed to finish off before Lent gained control of my wiser senses. I even couldn't stay away from chocolate at school, which resulted in my having to tragically decline chocolates that I'd earnt the right to after working hard all term - and quite possibly won't have another opportunity to enjoy anytime soon! 

Still, I'm determined to not look back at the past six weeks and only think of the many special deals I missed at Asda because tomorrow will mark my very first day in being able to consume chocolate once again. Yes, I'm honestly not kidding you or myself - even Google agrees with me! Tomorrow is recognised as Holy Thursday which, as far as I'm concerned, is the earliest opportunity to give up Lent - something that I'll definitely have no problem in doing. In the past, I've always waited until Easter Sunday to give myself permission to devour six weeks worth of chocolate, crisps or fizzy drinks, but something provoked me to check it out on the internet, which certainly suggested otherwise. To you, several days might represent nothing, but it's the opposite for me - the sooner, the better!

To be honest, I'm not sure if I want to go through Lent again because, what with sitting major exams next year, I don't know whether I'll have enough motivation to give up something that could very well be a symbol of relief and happiness during what will definitely be a stressful time. Chocolate is chocolate, but I appreciate it enough to not go mad whenever it is placed in front of me, though I'll probably struggle to contain myself when I let myself have a few squares in a days' time - how will I ever give it up again?

Anyway, I decided to get my favourite brand, Green and Black's, in honour of my efforts - both for successfully abstaining from chocolate and working hard in general - over the past few weeks. Usually, I don't like milk chocolate, but Green and Black's has proved to me that not all chocolate brands have adopted a sickly sweet flavour; hence why I'm reluctant to get an Easter egg this year because most of the ones sold in the supermarkets are produced with the cheapest and most disgusting ingredients. And, with an eagerness to try something new, I saw no problem in getting a milk chocolate bar infused with raisins and nuts, which will hopefully ease my guilt if I eat one too many squares in a single sitting. Really, you'd be amazed by the lengths I'd go to to remain healthy, even for something as sweet, delicious and creamy as chocolate! 

Thankfully, I've only got to wait for today to pass before my struggles are over, so I shall get on with some stuff (um, probably best if it wasn't cocoa-themed) until the best day of the week arrives - along with the many things that I recently ordered from Amazon. Something tells me that Thursday will be a very happy day...